Friday, August 31, 2012

This is me. The new me. The better me.

So I was feeling a little reminiscent today and started looking through some old pictures. Not to sound narcissistic, but I truly didn't realize how beautiful I was. I mean, I was a stunner. And I'm not going to lie, I miss looking like that, especially here (University of Texas). Everywhere you turn there's a beautiful girl.....and a really cute guy staring at that girl.I seriously can't turn my head without seeing some girl being flirted up. I found that there were no guys staring at me (except for the one who asked what happened to my hair and then walked off) or trying to get my digits. It is so easy for me to wish that I looked like I used to, but the thing is that I don't. No matter how many times I go to bed, I'm going to wake up a different person than the girl in the previous pictures. Not only have I changed physically, I've also changed mentally and spiritually. 

 I'm a different person and I'm a completely different kind of beauty. 

 Even though I miss my old looks, I love the way I am now more than I ever loved myself back then. I used to paint my face with makeup so that I could be "pretty", but now you'll rarely find me wearing more than mascara and blush. I love my life so much more now and I am so much closer to God. I'm so much more light hearted than I was before. Also, I'm more wise. I'm and old soul. I realize the importance of things that most people my age don't, so I don't sweat the small stuff. And I don't dabble in petty things. 
This is starting to sound like a profile for eHarmony.... what I'm trying to say is that although I struggle with my self image sometimes, I'm beautiful. I have a great personality and if guys don't realize that, then it's their loss. 
So here I am, the new me. The beautiful me. The bald me. The fun me. The wise me. The better me. I'm Lizzie 2.0

 This entry sounded really narcissistic, but I needed to write it. I needed to document these feelings while I still felt them, so when I feel down I can go back and read it. Sometimes I just need a reminder of how awesome I truly am.


  1. Homegirl, as a straight girl at UT:

    Damn. You are straight up cute in those pictures, hair or no hair. Or Avatar'n.

    1. Haha, thanks! Your comment made me smile. Thanks for the compliment!

  2. You. Are. Phenomenal. I have so much to say to you, but I can't stop reading. I will have more to say soon. I. Adore. You. You are providing me with such tremendous insight into the heart and mind of my beautiful girl Mattie who went to heaven 22 months ago at the age of 17. You MUST understand the tremendous gift you are giving in sharing how you are processing this journey and how you are LIVING! I am grateful beyond words.