Some days I'm like "Cancer is the best thing that ever happened to me" and other days I'm like "Cancer sucks". Today was one of those days. Cancer sucks a ton. It's crappy. It's not fun. It's a party pooper. I hate it. I was just thinking about the things that I really wanted to experience that I'm not going to now. Like marriage and babies. I get that you can't plan your life, I really do. God always has something different in mind, that is always better than what you have planned. BUT that doesn't always mean that you have to be happy about it. I'm fine with having cancer, but I just wish there was more time for me to do the things that I really really really wanted to do that are more long term than the things on my bucket list. Like marriage and babies and my own home and financing my own life. So from that view point, yes, cancer is the pooper of the party that is my life. I'm not angry with God at all, I'm just really sad that those things won't be a part of my life because five years just isn't enough time for all of that to happen.
Sorry about my vent session. Also, I'm now taking husband applications to speed the marriage process up.
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