Look at me posting up a storm this month!
So I listened to this Macklemore song called Otherside and it really has me thinking. I know it's about drugs, and has a really great lesson, listen to it, it's beautiful, but the song has me thinking more about my life plans.
At one point he says "I swore I was gonna be someone, and growing up everyone does." How true is that? Growing up I said I was going to travel the world, I was going to make a difference any way that I could. And then I got older and realized that life gets in the way and you can't always be what you imagined when you were a kid. Somehow I became totally content with the idea of being an accountant. I drifted so far from what I wanted to be because I was planning for the future. I liked the idea of security, and I still do. But now life isn't really letting me have that. I love having a plan and over the past year I have been struggling to make a new plan that suits the news I keep being told. But really that's impossible. Trying to make a plan only leaves me extremely stressed and in the middle of a self crisis trying to figure out where I'm going to go from here. I can't build a house if the sand beneath it keeps shifting. I keep trying to plan my life, saying I'll do this, this, then this, when in reality I can't. I don't know how I'm going to feel six months from now let alone tomorrow so there's no way I can plan the rest of my life. Even after these last scans I keep trying to change my plans and things that I really want to do are being pushed aside. So my point is, I swore I was going to do certain things when I grew up. Well here I am. I'm an adult and in the best health that I'll ever be. So why not do something now, while I still can? I am writing this and making it public to hold myself accountable. The things I want to do WILL happen. Life gets in the way and that's alright, but I'm honestly not going to have another opportunity to do these things and I can't let this opportunity go to waste in an effort to have a secure life. The fact is I'm never going to have a secure life.
So do something. And do it now.